One of the most important qualities we all need to foster is the ability to be kind to ourselves and recognise our strengths. Recently I have come to acknowledge one of my own strengths as the ability to stay calm under stressful situations. Slicing my arm open, and caring for a disfigured broken arm on a four year old. Pretty damn stressful. Yet my ability to logically assess situations and remember facts was not affected one bit. I handled each situation to the best of my ability and would not have done anything differently.
Sometimes I think children naturally seek comfort in me when they are stressed because they can sense that calm and are drawn to it. I don’t tend to respond emotionally (at least not outwardly) to situations and can empathise without losing my own composure.
Yet I’ve wondered if this calmness repels the opposite sex… I know I had one ex who complained that I was too calm during “disagreements” and wished that I would just yell at him! (You know who you are!) However I figured it’s just another filter of mine to sift out the ones who aren’t for me. After all, I am a rock, I can’t be swayed easily, pushed around or manipulated. I’m dependable, especially in times of stress. And my man, will appreciate all of this and love me for it.
You may question, does this calm cool logic mean then that I’m too collected to be ecstatic and excited? Sure, I might not always be the loudest to laugh at a joke… But my calm composure is just another hat I choose to put on. When I feel safe enough, I most certainly have the power and choice to take it off.
And let the inner child come out to play.
Had to hold and comfort a four-year old boy with a very broken arm (bent at the forearm, thinking about the limp dangling hand still makes me cringe) this afternoon. When he was in my arms all I could see was how brave he was, crying yet still voicing his feelings, still answering questions. He was in pain, but he was alert, and listening to all that is happening around him. All I could do was be present for him, and remain calm for him.
I know it hurts. It’s going to be ok. Daddy will be here soon. You’ll go to the hospital. The doctors will help you.
“Can you put your hand back?” My instinct was to support the elbow and keep it still. It seems to somewhat ease the pain, even after we put a sling on. And I was only too glad to be able to contribute in any little way possible to make him feel better. I am so grateful that I was able to focus and remain calm to comfort him. The worst thing that could happen was for children to see adults panic.
I won’t lie, I saw the look of horror and panic in other educators eyes when they saw his limp hand dangling at a strange angle off the middle of his forearm. Yet I am so proud of the professional team I work with, as everyone handled the situation to the best of their abilities. Those who couldn’t bare to look, supervised the rest of the children. Someone got the sling very quickly after I asked for it, and someone thought to give him an ice-block to comfort him. Of course our boss was immediately notified, who in turn, called the parents straightaway.
When the parents showed up, they too, were so brave. No wonder their son handled it so well. They quickly decided which hospital, and calmly talked to their son about how the doctor will take the pain away. Dad picked him up gently, and the boy asked his mother to support his arm.
Oh my heart goes out to them. Such a strong, brave family. I hope they were quickly attended to, I hope everything went smoothly, and I hope he recovers fully, soon.
Character building. I appreciate how this incident adds to life experience. But I think I’ve proven myself capable of handling high-stress situations now. Please. Spare me from any more accidents >_<
P.S. First thing I did when I got home? Can you guess it?
I reviewed first aid.
No longer shattered, no loose pieces… I’m not so broken after all! Woke up with the joy that I am surprisingly resilient and just, well, back to happy.
Like throwing pebbles in a lake… It bounces across the surface, causes splashes and sends out ripple after ripple. Yet the waves eventually stop, peace is restored, and the lake is a little richer yet unchanged.
I am still me. A little wiser; a lot more inspired.
Thank you my angels, for letting me see with clarity what I want, need, and deserve. Those three things may not overlap very much right now, but one day they will align. And I will be, everything to him as he will be to me. <3